Archive | April 2012

What is the Lesson?

After many, many years on this earth, I’ve come to realize that there is a lesson in every encounter and every experience. When I was much younger, if something (or someone) bad happened to me, the first question I would ask, would be, “Why?” I would then wrack my brain trying to figure out what I possibly could have done to deserve it.  It took a very long time to realize that many times, people and situations enter your life for several reasons – to make you stronger, to prepare you for something else, or to open your eyes to a situation that you may not even have been aware of. You can always learn from every situation and every person you encounter.

As those of you who have been following my autobiography know, there have been many experiences that I have gone through that have not been the best. I have done for some, only to find out at a later date, they had not been genuine and had an agenda all along.  I have been friends to some with smiling faces, to find out they had ulterior motives. As hurtful as these situations may have been, my skin is much thicker now and I’ve learned to just move on with no regrets. You cannot control what’s in another person’s heart. That is the lesson that I learned about those situations.

I have always been relatively healthy, so, when my recent medical situation came about, I knew there was a reason I was going through the situation. Again, I wracked my brain, “God is trying to tell me something. What is it?”  Many people told me that my body was trying to tell me to ‘slow down’. In a sense, I get that. But, I still knew there was something more.  After weeks and weeks of well wishes, prayers, and even orders to “slow down”, I thought the lesson was to show me who the truly sincere people were in my life. That very well may have been one of the lessons, but, there was one that was even bigger.

My number one concern the first week I had to take off from work was, “Oh, my goodness – my poor boss. What is going to happen to him with the office closed for a week. He has a family to support! My stress increased more-so for his business than my health.  The same thoughts ran through my mind regarding my landlord, when I realized I was going to be out of work for six weeks. “Oh, my goodness. What is he going to do if I can’t pay the rent? He has bills to pay.” My guilt grew each day because I was putting them in a financial bind. I felt even worse because they both had been so good to me and been extremely helpful and caring throughout my hospital stay. The more I thought about them, the less I concentrated on what I needed to be doing to get back on my feet.

Then, an epiphany!

Many people say how useless Facebook and Twitter are. In my case, the many messages, comments,  private calls and emails in response to my posts, made me realize that I really needed to think of myself first. ( I tried to make it back to work and had a minor setback). My rent was late – I told my landlord, I’d pay him as soon as I could. My boss said he needed me at work – I told him, I needed to take care of my medical issue, first. Once I did, I was able to get so much more accomplished and reached the professionals I needed to, to assist me in making a full recovery.  I’m not physically there, yet – but, things are looking up.  I must admit, I still felt a little guilty, but, it felt great making myself a priority. I’m going to start working on making myself a priority much more in the future. LESSON LEARNED.


Your Light Shines Through

I decided to post a 2nd ‘Thought for Thursday’ after receiving something special today. I cannot thank everyone enough. Your thoughtfulness and kindness will not be forgotten. Much love to you ALL…again.



10 Ways to Love


1. LISTEN without interruption (Proverbs 18)

2. SPEAK without accusing (James 1:19) 

3. GIVE without sparing (Proverbs 21:26)

4. PRAY without ceasing (Colossians 1:9)

5. ANSWER without arguing (Proverbs 17:1)

6. SHARE without pretending (Ephesians 4:15)

7. ENJOY without complaint (Philippians 2:14)

8. TRUST without wavering (Corinthians 13:7 

9. FORGIVE without punishing (Colossians 3:13)

10. PROMISE without forgetting (Proverbs 13:12)

Thank You to You All ….[And, Get a Second Opinion]

View from my hospital bed the night before I was released

This is my first ‘Thought for Thursday’ in a few weeks. Many on Twitter and Facebook know that this is due to the fact that I was in the hospital for 24 days. This blog isn’t about that [But, to quickly recap for those who may have missed it, I initially had an “attack” in the middle of February. I was rushed to two different hospitals on three separate occasions, misdiagnosed and sent home with pain medication.  After my fourth – and most dramatic “attack”, I was again rushed to a third hospital, diagnosed with pneumonia and admitted. I thought I might be in the hospital for a few days, a week at most. As it turned out, I was in the hospital for 24 days.]

During my 24 days in the hospital, I had many painful procedures. There were complications and issues with every single procedure I had – from drawing blood [I had to have special people called to draw blood] and inserting IVs [they finally had to call a nurse they called the “vein whisperer’, and eventually had to insert a PICC line],  the

There were complications when I had the thoracocentesis and I felt every inch of the needle going in. It was extremely painful. The Dr. apologized afterwards and said that they usually weren’t that difficult.

two most painful procedures, a thoracocentesis and a chest tube insertion. Although this was the most painful thing I have ever been through in my life, it was also the most enlightening.

From day one, I received so many prayers, get well wishes, emails, calls and visits.  Some people I hadn’t even heard from in weeks, months – even years. Those were very pleasant surprises. The prayers, graphics, videos were just as healing as the pain medication.  I even received a few surprise calls and emails from some special people I wasn’t even aware knew of my condition. The main reason for this blog post is to say THANK YOU TO YOU ALL!

My biggest thanks must go to my friend, Millette. After my third trip to the hospital, she left her home at 4am in the morning to pick me up from my home, so that I could spend the weekend at her home. I told her it wasn’t necessary because resting at home, would be no different from resting at her home. THANK GOD she persisted because I had the worst attack at her place. I could not breathe, I could not talk, I would have been unable to call 911 since I was having

One of my nurses. They were amazing. After I had the chest tube taken out, everyone was so happy. Two of my nurses said that I was their favorite patient and some even dropped in to say hello even when they weren’t assigned to me.

issues with my cell phone. She kept me alert and on my feet until the ambulance arrived, because the 911 operator told her if I were to lay down my lungs could collapse. The episode was very chaotic and we both said afterwards it was the scariest thing either of us had ever been through. She was with me when I was diagnosed, and we both breathed a sigh of relief finally knowing why I had been in so much pain for the past few weeks and had to keep getting rushed to the hospital.

Every day that I was in the hospital, she called me three times a day to check on me and visited me approximately every other day. There is no way I can ever repay her for being there for me during the most physically challenging thing I have ever been through in my life. Just the thought of having someone like her in my life brings me to tears.

One cautionary piece of advice – ALWAYS GET AT LEAST TWO DIAGNOSIS’. It took me four visits to three different hospitals before they got it right.


In case you’re interested – below is a video of each of the three procedures I had while in the hospital. Be forewarned, it’s not easy to watch and I am SO glad I watched them AFTER I had them done. LOL

On the day I thought I was leaving the hospital, they came to get me for this surprise procedure

Chest tube insertion (actual procedure starts approx. 1 minutein). I pleaded to be put to sleep, but the surgeon said it was too dangerous.

I was an extremely “hard stick” as they put it, so they eventually had to insert a PICC line [to draw blood and administer my antibiotics]. My Dr. said it was a last resort since the end of the tube is so close to the heart.