Over the years I have come in contact with those, who for some reason or another, want to engage me in a verbal argument. I have done rather well in maintaining my composure and not “giving in”. The most recent incident occurred two days ago, when I was dealing with a first time vendor.
I placed an order for a service and asked the woman who was handling the account to fax over an invoice [and credit card authorization form, if necessary]so that I could make payment. “Pay first! ” she snapped. I told her I needed to confirm the charge amount and that the order was correct before I made payment. She proceeded to scream and hurl as many insults as she could – “You don’t know what you’re doing!”, “You’re worthless!”, etc.
Without raising the tone of my voice to match hers, I told her to calm down and let me call my boss to get authorization to pay her because this was our procedure for everything we purchase. “Well, your procedure is wrong!” “Who hired you?”, etc… Even with her rudeness and unprofessionalism, I wasn’t going to hang up on her, but told her I would call her back after I spoke to him. “No, I’m not hanging up until you pay me!” She was making it extremely difficult to complete the transaction, and even said she was going to have me fired. Still, I wasn’t going to let her change my demeanor. I said, “God Bless you and have a wonderful day,” after I gave her our credit card information.
Approximately five minutes later, she called back with these words [paraphrasing], “I called back to apologize. I am so sorry for the way I spoke to you. I get like that, sometimes. You were just doing your job and I had no right to speak to you that way. It was a pleasure doing business with you and I hope you have a great day.
Not all scenarios will end the same way, but the point of the story and my ‘Thought for Thursday’ is that IT TAKES TWO people to engage in an argument. If someone approaches you with an attitude, negative disposition or intentionally or unintentionally tries to ruffle your feathers – don’t let them. The natural response may be, “I’m not going to allow someone to speak to me that way – which no one should; but, if you both go at it tit-for-tat there will be no resolution to the situation. Things will inevitably escalate and make matters worse. If there is no talking to the person or calming them down, let them rant and rave by themselves. Sometimes, an earlier situation may be the cause of them “snapping” for no reason and you are just the person they choose to release their frustrations upon. Regardless of the reason, nothing positive can come from two, or more, people yelling back and forth at each other. No one gets heard.
Remember if you respond to negativity with negativity, the outcome will NEVER be a good one. However, if you stay positive and pleasant, there is a probable chance that there will be a positive outcome…and perhaps even an apology to come your way. 🙂
I have received many responses to many of the posts on this blog, thus far. However, may I request that you please reply in the comment section of the blog – as opposed to on Twitter, Facebook, emails, etc. – so that all responses will be together. Your comment may be helpful to others who come across something that they can relate to. You can comment anonymously.
Thank you and many blessings.